For Sammi

Sammi needs our love and kind thoughts atm. She is having some difficulties on her healing journey and we need to send our love and healing vibes to her!

Sammi, please know you're in our thoughts while you face this new phase in your healing journey. As each new leaf opens up it reveals a new layer or part of your TRUE self, and that is not always easy or pleasurable. But I know you are determined to heal well, and heal fully, so I hope you are able to fully embrace the pain as a tool for healing rather than a sign of failure or weakness.

I am sorry you are feeling so troubled by your journey to motherhood, please know you are not alone. Many have trodden that path before you and survived. You will also survive! There IS a light at the end of the dark tunnel. And you know that because you started this forum with the intent of helping others on their healing journey!!!!

xxooxxooxxooxxooxx

Sending you love and hugs. Don't be afraid to ask for anything. If we can do it we will.

Thanks wonderful friends. I just feel overwhelmed by it all at the moment. I guess I had this view that I'd be over birth trauma in a couple of months. This is just so different from anything I've dealt with before!

I really really appreciate your thoughts and wisdom!

It takes most of us a couple of years of hard slog to move through this kind of trauma. It is about the most visceral, primal injury possible. *hugs* Don't be a stranger to help.

I don't think you ever "get over" it as such. You just move into a different space where it isn't as powerful in your life. And yet, things still come up that can shock and disturb you, and take you back to those first painful minutes and days days after/during a birth rape, even 10yrs later! It's important to view this as grief - first and foremost because it IS grief. It acts in a very similar way to grief, but is somehow deeper because of the fearful and powerless feelings associated with the memories. You are grieving a part of yourself, you are grieving a rite of passage that you were denied by a barbaric, all powerful institution, and you are grieving what should have been the most joyful and powerful day of your life as a womyn and mother.

More hugs!

I know I still get shocked by a lot of the things that go through my mind--things I'd thought I'd forgotten about. I think so many people assume that one will somehow forget trauma--perhaps they forget our trauma because it is not first-hand for them--but I find you don't forget, it just doesn't always occupy the forefront of your mind. And some days it occupies it more than others.

You are not weak to be feeling this way. You are strong to face your fears. Go Sammi!

Sammi is moving house atm, so ....

lots of luv to you! To me, uprooting, packing it all in boxes, settling in, and then unpacking AGAIN! is about as stressful as anything!!!

I hope it's going smoothly, and I hope you are going to be wonderfully happy in your new home

Hope to see you about soon

sending you hugs